There are no words. There's no patience left. This week Bob and Matt force hilarious Baltimore comedian and member of the LaughFinder Podcast, Jim Meyer to endure the 10th film in the AIR BUD legacy, A FUCKING PREQUEL to SANTA BUDDIES...THE SEARCH FOR SANTA PAWS! Join these three men as they sled through this shit pole trying to figure out why santa is now that guy from Office Space? Can the all powerful christmas ice sickle create fully formed sentient life from ostensibly nothing? Does this children's movie feature scenes where Santa and Dog Santa both die onscreen? Do all New York orphanages have crematory-sized dual furance/incerators in the basement? Will we ever find out who exactly Mr. Hucklebuckle is??? WHAT YEAR DOES THIS MOVIE TAKE PLACE IN??? Grab your ice sickle necklace and listen up, because we finally watched an AIR BUD movie without a single "AIR BLOOD RELATIVE" in it. Fuck.
Friedrich Nietzsche said "To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering." Matt and Bob welcome returning guest, Baltimore comedian and co-host of MOVIE SCHMOVIE, Ronald James to their world of pain, this time with the iron maiden that is SANTA BUDDIES! That's AIR BUD 9 for anyone that's still counting. Listen in as the guys discuss SEVERAL different individual scenes where people actively talk toward a dormant crystal. Is George Wendt falling asleep? Does director Robert Vince understand poverty? Does Christopher Lloyd need money this bad? Can anyone explain who exactly SANTA PAWS is? Answers are one jolly click away!
Lucky episode number 13 gets incredibly weird when Huey, John and Bob have to fend for their lives without Rex, and they don't do well. They review the absolutely baffling fun of THE FATE OF THE FURIOUS and dig into to reviewing newly release hollywood trailers and if reviewing trailers is even worthwhile at all. Huey is EXCITE, Bob shuts down because of the DCEU and John starts having a stroke because STAR WARS is apparently just SUBWAY. Stay after the end bumper for a half hour conversation about Time Travel...You're welcome? Eat fresh.
Trailers reviewed: Kingsman2: The Golden Circle, The Hitman's Bodyguard, Transformers: The Last Knight, The Mummy, Baby Driver, Justice League, Thor: Ragnarok, Star Wars: The Last Jedi
TRAILER PLAYLIST ON YOUTUBE!
Nothing Lao Tzu says matters anymore. Bob and Matt welcome Baltimore comedian Ian Salyers to experience the inevitable, the moment Air Bud's spawn breach the atmosphere and make their way into the heavens closer to God's love than ever before! SPACE BUDDIES once again brings about director Robert Vince's fetishistic obsession with constant introducing of Buddah, Rosebud, MudBud, Budderball and B-Dawg to new heights. Does Dauber from COACH own a Ferret that can talk to dogs? Do we as a people really appreciate Diedrich Bader enough? How gross can a child's drooling problem get before Matt passes out from screaming? Listen to find out all these answers and more! Also enjoy an actual dog related emergency happen during the episode!
Lao Tzu said "DON'T WATCH AIR BUD MOVIES." Well Bob and Matt are halfway there, up is down, left is down, right is down...it's all down. Who Cares. Listen to returning guest, comedian Bryan Preston, ride the sled as Bob and Matt pull him through SNOW BUDDES! That's right, AIR BUD 7, THE MOVIE THAT KILLED 5 PUPPIES. Was it worth it? Does the plot involve carpet bombing Alaska with ice cream? Does an entire town watch a bunch of dogs slowly drown for entertainment? The answers are NO, YES, YES...but please still listen for all the rest of the frosty excitement featuring the voice talents of Jim Belushi, Whoopi Goldberg, Kris Kristofferson, Molly Shannon and the return of Tom Everett Scott as Air God himself. Sorry, Bud.
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SHORT REVIEW: 4 Roger Ebert Thumbs sort of pointing down?
The MOUND boys come together to review a movie they barely have any passion for based off source material they...barely have any passion for, POWER RANGERS! Rex, Huey, John and Bob ask the question for the ages, if no one had any pre-existing knowledge of Power Rangers, would this serious, sullen, Nolen-esque take on the show make any sense? The answer is...no. Bryan Cranston sleepwalks, Bill Hader gets a paycheck for 2 hours in a recording booth, and everyone needs to hide all their gold because Rita Repulsa is coming to do something vaguely non-specific with it! This episode sponsored by Krispy Kreme.
Lao Tzu said "Respond intelligently even to unintelligent treatment." Matt, Bob and this week's returning guest, comedian Kathy Carson, do their best to respond to AIR BUD 6 aka AIR BUDDIES! Join these three as they watch the last film role of the legendary Don Knotts and the first of many adventures with B-Dawg, Rosebud, Budderball, Buddah and Mudbud. Hear the muted joy of experiencing TALKING animals for the first time in the AIR BUD CINEMATIC UNIVERSE! Learn about a voice cast assembled, most likely through blackmail, consisting of Molly Shannon, Abigail Breslin, Tom Everett Scott, Wallace Shawn and Michael Clarke Duncan! Can an evil rare-animal collector/whine vineyard proprietor from Latka's home country dognap Air Bud's children? Will Bud verbally explain why he hasn't spoken english for 5 entire movies up until now? Will Fernfield's systemic racism explain why the Framm's black neighbors have no say in the puppy adoption process despite being the legal owners of Molly, their mother? All the answers, and absolutely no pudding or napkins, are just a click away!
Get extra depressed by reading this: Special Screening and Press Day on the Walt Disney Studios Lot
Lao Tzu said: "The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness." Matt, Bob and returning guest, Baltimore comedian Bryan Preston, are most certainly being introduced to higher dimensions of consciousness when they watch AIR BUD: SPIKES BACK, a movie that involves the JEWEL OF ETERNITY. What is that? Who cares, nothing matters. All the answers can be found on the WIKIPEDIA page for the movie, which contains the following plot synopsis:
In Disney's fifth installment to the franchise, Air Bud finds that he also has the uncanny ability to play volleyball. Throughout this experience he and a talking parrot stop some crooks and make some new friends who pledge allegiance to the Islamic State of Syria and Iraq and promptly leave for Syria. Air Bud is radicalized, but when he starts starving in the Syrian desert, he is forced to eat his parrot friend. Air Bud, after wandering around for hours, is killed in a drone strike taken out by the US Army.
Listen to the episode to find out how accurate that is!
Lao Tzu said "He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough." Bob and Matt are starting to have enough. This week, with the help of Baltimore comedian Eric Glaeser, the boys drank a vile of the super sports gene serum and watched AIR BUD: SEVENTH INNING FETCH! What's left to say? Is it a baseball movie at all? How is it possible for a dog to bat? Why did the series go from being obsessed with semen to fecal matter? WHY IS BUD NOT MORE FAMOUS!? Scientists are evil and Bud is almost certainly a dead human father! LISTEN AND FIND OUT THE TRUTH!
SPOILER WARNING!!! FIFTY SHADES DARKER review! The fellas of MOUND take the opportunity to discuss INTERNALIZED MISOGYNY 2: DON'T GET WOKE even though they probably should keep their privileged traps shut about such dreck. Luckily Rex, Huey, Bob and John aren't alone on this slovenly BDSM cosplay adventure, because they are joined by Baltimore musician and LIFETIME movie expert Lala Anderson who gives the guys much needed perspective on WHY PEOPLE SEEM TO LIKE THESE. Sit back and enjoy Rex's love for 900 unresolved plot-lines, Bob's delight over Vin Diesel-related scene dressing, John's overload of one-liners and Huey's disenfranchised anger over not being asleep.